Experiencing without a Security Desire
What probably happens in the experiencing of people if they don’t permit and seek any, or hardly any, security? Initially, such people experience themselves as internally rather care-free, thus, they are often in a state that fascinates others. They don’t have too many concerns, they experience the moment and live for the present. Sometimes they appear like ‘big children’ and this is also how they see themselves: free, unrestricted, ‘everything is possible and nothing will keep me from it’. The bitter ending usually arrives when, due to a lack of care, the reality relentlessly forces its way into life. Then suddenly, the economic provisions and the physical depletion announce themselves with more or less drastic symptoms and the lack of commitment in relationships becomes noticeable through loneliness and isolation. Therefore, if people appear rather free, it is important, in counselling, to investigate exactly whether the security need is experienced or whether it is pushed to one side or separated out.