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Disengagement Competence

Maybe it sounds banal: the more accurately the counsellor can describe how a client, or a team, appears, the more effective are the interventions. For this, the counsellor needs the abilities of a poet, i.e. the vocabulary plays a great role. It makes a difference whether the counsellor says: “You appear to be careful!” or whether he says: “Just now, as you were speaking about the feedback from your boss, you spoke with a very quiet voice and sunk into your chair. At the same time something really tender and vulnerable emerged, which spoke to me. Does my impression resonate with you?”

Describing includes all perception channels, visual, auditory, kinaesthetic. The counsellor can also use internal images, comparisons or metaphors. Everything which serves the function of enabling the client to notice what he reveals about himself (new or undesired), is needed here and is change relevant.

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